My Story.

I grew up in a good home, a mom, a dad and a half brother. My half brother is 14 years older than me, he left when I was 3 years old. He became an alcoholic, that I choose not to get close to. The last time I felt good about myself was when I was six years old. At age six, I was diagnosed w/ selective mutism and had to go to therapy to get over it. By second grade, I was talking to everyone and I was doing good. In 4th grade, my grandma, my best friend had passed away, and it all went downhill from there. I began to have a binge eating disorder, and at most I weighed 150 pounds. I was the biggest in my class. I began to get very low self esteem. I always felt like I didn't belong on this earth, but now it was becoming apparent. At age ten, I was diagnosed w/ anxiety and depression. I would miss 60 + days of school a year, because of the anxiety of school, that I had. At age eleven, I got diagnosed w/ OCD, which I wrote a sotry about on my other blog. When I was twelve, I began to get obsessed w/ calories and nutrition. I was eating healthy again, and went from 150 lbs, to 120 lbs, healthily. At age 13, It became obsessive, I would exercise for 2 hours a day and starve for days at a time. I had went from a healthy 120 lbs, to 105 lbs in a month's time. My goal was and is 80 lbs, as I have not yet recovered. My self injury started a few months after my eating disorder. I would cut, burn and beat myself up. I still have all of these problems, but the thing that I am most proud of, is that I overcame taking pills to get high & drinking, I haven't done that in over 6 months, & I am very happy about that. The oddity is.. I'm fourteen years old today.

What is OCD ? Hell.

Obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder characterized by involuntary intrusive thoughts. When a sufferer begins to acknowledge these intrusive thoughts, the sufferer then develops anxiety based on the dread that something bad will happen. The sufferer feels compelled to voluntarily perform irrational, time-consuming physical behaviors to diminish the anxiety.

Sufferers often try to keep their compulsive behaviors hidden from others, often to avoid embarrassment, humiliation or to avoid being seen as strikingly odd or different from others. If the condition is not realized by an undiagnosed sufferer, they may scold themselves in frustration as to why they are thinking or acting the way they are. Although the acts of those who have OCD may appear paranoid and come across to others as psychotic, an OCD sufferer is able to recognize their thoughts and subsequent actions as irrational, which is what makes the illness so distressing. The psychological self-awareness of the irrationality of the disorder may be painful; a sufferer may be plagued by doubt and uncertainty regarding their own feelings and behaviors. A principal challenge faced by OCD sufferers is learning to manage their own behaviors without constant reassurance from others.

OCD is the fourth most common mental disorder and is diagnosed nearly as often as the physiological ailments asthma and diabetes mellitus.^[1] In the United States, one in 50 adults has OCD.^[2] The phrase "obsessive–compulsive" has become part of the English lexicon, and is often used in an informal or caricatured manner to describe someone who is meticulous, perfectionistic, absorbed in a cause, or otherwise fixated on something or someone.^[3] Although these signs are often present in OCD, a person who exhibits them does not necessarily have OCD, and may instead have obsessive–compulsive personality disorder (OCPD) or some other condition.

Obsessions

1. Recurrent and persistent thoughts, impulses, or images that are experienced as intrusive and that cause marked anxiety or distress.
2. The thoughts, impulses, or images are not simply excessive worries about real-life problems.
3. The person attempts to ignore or suppress such thoughts, impulses, or images, or to neutralize them with some other thought or action.
4. The person recognizes that the obsessional thoughts, impulses, or images are a product of his or her own mind, and are not based in reality.

Compulsions

1. Repetitive behaviors or mental acts that the person feels driven to perform in response to an obsession, or according to rules that must be applied rigidly.
2. The behaviors or mental acts are aimed at preventing or reducing distress or preventing some dreaded event or situation; however, these behaviors or mental acts are not actually connected to the issue, or they are excessive.

In addition to these criteria, at some point during the course of the disorder, the individual must realize that his/her obsessions or compulsions are unreasonable or excessive. Moreover, the obsessions or compulsions must be time-consuming (taking up more than one hour per day), cause distress, or cause impairment in social, occupational, or school functioning.^[4] OCD often causes feelings similar to those of depression.

Tales of Obessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

I've had OCD since I was 10 years old. It started with compulsive thoughts of locking doors, and hoping that robbers would not break into the house or fires wouldn't burn down my house.

At age 13, I began to check doors and alarm clocks repeatedly, not remembering if I did something right, or if I remembered to do something. I'd check the door about 50 times before I could leave it alone. Some words would annoy me too, people couldn't say gurgling, penetrate, or lumpy in front of me, or I would cringe and have to perform rituals to get it out of my head. I would take 2 to 4 baths a day, cause I never thought I was clean enough. Things were never good enough for me.

I began to get many phobias, like porcelain dolls, I cannot be around them. Bees, clowns, being left alone, and death are only some of my phobias that I have.

I couldn't not do anything without being indecisive, wondering if it was the right decision for me. Nothing could be done in odd numbers, everything had to be even numbers or it drove me crazy. Mostly everything in my life had to be planned and organized.

At 14, I began to count calories, and that's where my anorexia started. I went from 150 pounds to 112 lbs in a one month period.

Even though I still have OCD and anorexia, I am seeking treatment for both and I want you to know, there is hope, go seek help, before it takes over your life, and if it already has, it is never too late.

KIds being affected by OCD.

Danielle, 11, has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), a mental health condition that affects her behavior. An expert describes the most common symptoms and the treatment for children.